Originally published on Evidence Based Advisor Marketing

You’re well-intentioned.  You really want to help those who inquire about your services.

It’s sad you create so many obstacles when meeting with prospects.  It’s because many of you have your eye on the wrong ball.

It’s not about you

People come to us seeking our expertise.  It’s only logical to believe they’re interested in listening to our carefully prepared presentation.

This is a big misconception.  It’s the primary reason we fail to convert more prospects into clients.  That’s unfortunate because prospects would be well served if they retained us.

Repeat this mantra:  It’s not about me.

Prospects have issues they want us to resolve.  These issues aren’t always obvious.  We’re unlikely to find out what they are by discussing who we are, what we do, why we’re qualified and how much we charge.

There’s only one certain way to learning their agenda.  Ask them.

I know it’s simple, but few advisors follow this advice.  They convey information, instead of eliciting it.

Again:  It’s not about you.

Ditch your process

Many of you have elaborate processes you believe help you communicate with your clients.  These range from a simple questionnaire to learning intimate details about their thought process and personal life.

Here’s my advice:  Ditch your process.  It’s a mistake on many levels.

It’s intrusive and presumptuous.  If I met you socially, how would you feel if I asked you a series of personal questions and gave you multiple choice options?

You’d think I was a jerk, and look for a way to extricate yourself from our conversation.

Your prospect doesn’t know you.  Their initial issue is whether they like and trust you.  If those boxes aren’t checked, they’re not going to hire you.

We don’t like or trust people who compel us to answer uncomfortable questions as part of an initial process.

There’s only one surefire way to get people to like and trust us:  Empower them to talk about themselves. Let them guide the conversation.

When you understand it’s not about you, ditch the pitch and ask nice, soft, open-ended questions, you’ll be well on your way to focusing on the right ball.

Try it.

Resource of the week:

This article in Forbes discusses the power of asking questions.